It’s funny, I was writing a post by the same name, wondering how you might know if it’s love. How can you be sure, I thought, when you don’t know your subjectivity is the same as someone else’s? How do we know we’re all talking about the same thing? And so on and so forth, philosophizing. Then I fell in love for the first time. On the first day it was just an inkling – the words I think I’m in love with this girl passing through my head. That’s interesting, I thought, taking little notice. Being with her sure did feel nice though. A week later I knew for sure. What else could it be??
Falling in love seems appropriate enough. Being “in” love, too. Sharing a little bubble together, traversing a world otherwise untouched by it but now seen through its shimmer. You have your own brand of it, to be sure, but the universal element remains. Enough that strangers notice, and maybe comment if they’re feeling bold or drunk. Universal enough for me to understand romance movies now – at least a lot more than I used to. People watch them because in so doing they get to participate, at least a little, in the most intoxicating possible experience for a human being.
A drug analogy fits, at least in the sense of being high. That doesn’t really do it justice though – drugs are malleable and manipulable. You can compartmentalize the experience; you can be rational about them. Not this. It is addictive though, that’s for sure. Can’t get enough. And the withdrawal’s bad too – about as bad as it gets.
The ancient Greeks had a good handle on love, as with many things. For them it was being possessed by a goddess – that is what it feels like too. A foreign entity has invaded, completed its hostile takeover and is now occupying your soul. Say goodbye to your reasoning faculties. Good luck with that decision making. Thought and behaviour is now dictated against your best interests. Not a good idea; doesn’t matter, you do it anyway. What am I doing? You think to yourself. How did I get myself into this..?
And of course the other person’s right there with you, likely going through the exact same thing. That’s what makes it beautiful and magical, crazy and fun. A romance. An adventure. Well, until it isn’t. But it’ll come again…