What is Frustration?
Frustration is something that you never need to experience again if you don’t want to.
And yet, people get frustrated all the time. They get frustrated because it is raining outside and they want to go to the park, or because their favourite TV show got cancelled.
People get frustrated about the results of a sports game, or about being stuck in traffic. People get frustrated about traffic so often that they invented the term “road rage” just to describe this special type of frustration.
But what is frustration?
Frustration is caused by trying to control things that are out of your control.
A traffic jam or sports game are common examples. But what about another person’s behaviour?
Frustration and Other People’s Behaviour
Chances are, unless a person is your child or subordinate, you cannot control their behaviour. Even in these cases, control is limited and the other person ultimately decides what they do.
But people become frustrated by the behaviour of others all the time.
Why would you spend emotional energy becoming frustrated by what someone else is doing, especially when it is out of your control?
Frustration about the Past and Future
Another common source of frustration is events that have happened in the past. It’s always tempting to think, “if only I had done this,” or “if only it had worked out like that,” but this is wishful thinking that wastes your time and energy.
What’s done is done and that is completely out of your control.
The future is exactly the same. People will stress themselves to death thinking about what will happen at some time in the future, and try to make sure it turns out the way they want it to. But, like the past, what happens in the future is completely out of your control.
How to Never Get Frustrated Again
When you begin to get frustrated about something, recognize right away whether or not the source is within your control.
If is it something you can control, then good. You can go about solving it like you would any other problem.
But if it is not, then drop it completely.
Awareness is the key. If you can recognize when something is out of your control, then you can choose to leave it alone. When you become aware of this, you can simply decide whether or not to let something frustrate you.
To sum up:
- Frustration is caused by trying to control things that are out of your control
- This includes traffic and the weather, but also other people’s behaviour, as well as events in the past or future
- The key to never getting frustrated is to recognize when the source of frustration is out of your control
- Once you are aware of this, it is easy to decide to stop expending energy on frustration
Don’t waste yourself becoming frustrated by things you cannot control. You should instead be spending your time and energy on making good decisions, making your vision a reality, and on the problems and concerns that are within your control.
Do you have any thoughts on this topic, or an opinion to add? Please share it in the comments section below.